Verse 1:
GG/BCD
He gets up real early on his morning drive
GG/BCD
Down to the office for his nine to five
GG/BC C*
He drives a 94 two-tone economy car
DDC-walkdown
Loves to tell the local boys down at the bar
DD
That he?s the critic, yea I can hook ya up
C-walkdown
I know everyone in the business
Verse 2:
GG/BCD
He flunked junior high band he couldn?t march in time
GG/BCD
He tried to write a song once but he couldn?t make it rhyme
GG/BC C*
He learned 2 or 3 chords on a pawn-shop guitar
DDC-walkdown
He just never quite had what it took to be a star
DD
So he?s a critic, yea I work for the Gazette
C-walkdown
I got a real job
Bridge:
He wrote a five star column on a band you never heard
(some kind of walkdown)
He wrote a bluegrass review without an unkind word
He thought it was time to ask his boss for a raise
His boss said, I can? even tell
If anyone?s even reading your page (back to Intro licks
For rhythm)
Verse 3:
GG/BCD
So he thought and he thought a little more
GG/BCD
He saw a young hot star headed into town
GG/BCD
Then he hid behind his typewriter and gunned the boy down
GG/BC C*
Here come the letters, the emails, the faxes
DDC-walkdown
They raised him to 20,000 dollars after taxes
DD
He?s a happy critic, yea he?s rollin? in the dough
(rest is spoken over the Intro tabbed above)
GG/BCD
This is easy they?re all reading my column
Please don?t tell my momma
That I write the music column for the Gazette
She still thinks I play piano down at the Cathouse
Let's get funky with this now boys
Play it on
Come on Shannon
There's ol' Bill jumpin' in
Glenn's layin' it down
Come on Shannon
Aah My man Steve
Man my fingers are gettin' tired Ya'll gonna have to hurry
This snappin' thing wearin' me out
Theres ol Shannon guess he was on a coffee break
They're gonna love you cause they already love me
Yeah It's the critic
This arrangement for the song is the author's own work and represents their interpretation of the song. You may only use this for private study, scholarship, or research.